Learning to throw things out......

In some ways, I am a pack rat.  Not like the hoarders show on TV......I just tend to keep things.

Yesterday, Jenn and I went to the office.  I am going to switch offices soon so it was time to purge and move.  We emptied the overheads and desk drawers.  Then I got overwhelmed.......there was stuff everywhere.  Jenn rolled over the shred bin and I started to go through papers....lots and lots of papers.  Most of them were training materials......all of which have either been updated or are available online. Some of the documents were 4 years old.  Well that shred bin was much heavier by the time I was done.  Then there was a box for things to bring home.  I know I had gotten carried away with things on my desk.....little things here and there....way too much "stuff".  Into the "take it home box" it went. Then we moved the things I don't need right now to my new office.  There was a lot of junk in my new desk drawers so I used hand sanitizer and cleaned them out.  Before I knew it, we were done. I am now partially in 2 offices but the things I have left to move when the official move takes place will be easy to relocate.

Then when we got home I looked at my pile of magazines.......Family Circle, Good Housekeeping, Coastal Living, Weight Watchers and the Food Network......I kept saving them saying on maybe I will want to try this recipe or that decorating idea.....enough was enough.  The recycle bin nows weighs about 50 pounds....OK maybe that is a slight exaggeration......but all the magazines are gone.....well except for a few food network issues which had either holiday suggestions or food I love on the cover.

Last night, I took another trip through my clothes.........once again I decided to get rid of some.  Too big or am I ever really going to wear this again was part of my thought process.

I am ready to pitch my herb garden and trade it in for pumpkins and mums.  No, my spider plants are not getting pitched.....yet.....they tend to last into November.  I usually trade them out for the Christmas lights so they can hang around a bit longer.

During this process of getting rid of things I found some pens I really like, nice new t shirts and there is actually a top on the small chest I have in my bedroom (all the magazines had been piled up there).

Things look fresh and declutered......I still have a lot of "stuff" that at some point I will throw away or pack up but I am not quite ready to do that yet.  I figure it will have to be done before I head to my next location but since I have time before that happens I don't have to do it right now.

The great part was I had the energy to do all these things!!!! Part of the getting healthier and more mobile process.  I keep thinking to myself....just a year ago I couldn't have done this or that.......and that makes me happy.......just part of the long and winding road on my journey.......but at least now the steps are a little easier and lighter.......and on I go.......

See you next week......

Football, Baseball and The Fall.....

I love autumn.......there is hope of 90-100 degree days are finally fading away.  The leaves start changing.....somewhere.  Sweater weather.......not really in SC until December but oh well. And of course there is football......and the winding down of baseball.

Last year, the fall was my turning point. It was then I decided I needed to make some changes to improve my health, mobility and life expectancy.  It is hard to believe it has been about a year since I went back to WW for the zillionth time.  But here I am a year later......more mobile......more confident........and definitely healthier.

I still struggle with compliments.......and want to keep adding "it is a work in progress"......like you wouldn't already know looking at me.

In the last few months, I have added color to my wardrobe, just the way the leaves of green turn to red, orange and gold. We took a ride on the Blue Ridge Highway last October to enjoy the foliage.  I never thought of how the leaves and I have traveled the same path in the last year.

Then there is football and baseball.....

 Baseball is a long season which sometimes makes me crazy because of its length.  In the same way, my WW journey is a long one. The Yankees have been on a journey like me.....in first place, close to first place, falling a few games out of first place but holding on to their wild card hopes.  I am not where I had hoped to be after a year but was reminded today at my meeting ...... where would I be today if I had never started.  You sometimes have to reset goals and be realistic.  The NSV's matter a lot too (non-scale victories).  For example, Friday night I met my friend, Mary for dinner at Cracker Barrel.  I checked ahead of time about which foods would be my best choice.  I wanted a biscuit so bad but passed it up. I could have had it but was it worth 5 points and then the points for the butter on it......not this time.  I had bought some new capris and hadn't worn them yet.  I decided to wear them Friday night.  because they fit better than what I had been wearing.... right away I thought they were too tight.  Jenn told me they were supposed to look like that.......just not used to it.  Mary greeted me with a big smile and said "your pictures do not do you justice"......I still find it hard to wrap my head around those kinds of comments/compliments.  I don't think the fat girl will ever let me go......the lifelong hold she has had on my head and heart will not be easily removed if ever......but she is getting smaller and no longer front and center.

Football as it was explained to me once by Lou Holtz at a Ladies Football Clinic is all about 10 yards.  Get 10 yards then go for another 10 yards and then another until you score.  With WW, it is about 5 pounds at a time.  As I have said before, I cannot think about my final WW goal but I can handle 5 pounds.  Sometimes you get knocked back in yardage in a football game and sometimes at WW the scale is up a little.....then other times there is a long pass or run and you move more than the 10 yards........that is like the weeks when the scale moves down more than I anticipated.

I was raised loving the fall......leaves, pumpkins, apply picking, cool weather.....the changes of  the seasons.  While I start to enjoy the changes that make up life.

I was raised loving football and baseball......
New York Yankees.... from Mantle, Marris and  Yogi to Jeter, Rivera and Petit
New York Giants......from Y A Tittle, Sam Huff and Frank Gifford to Eli, Beckham and Cruz

And now while I am in the autumn of my years.....I am loving life..... with more confidence, much improved  health and increased mobility.......one pound at a time.

See you  next week......

Saying Yes More Than No

Part of the metamorphosis I am going through involves saying "yes" to more things.  The "no's" are becoming less.

And you never know where your inspiration might come from.......

Is it my WW pals?? They make Sunday mornings special and are a constant source of support.  They share the successes and help me through the plateau's and down times.  They understand what I  am going through.  I have bared my soul to them and feel such a sense of not being alone when I am with them.

Is it my old dear friends?? They have been encouraging and positive.  They know this battle is not easy for me.  They also try to make it easier by adjusting menu's when I am with them.  They also comment on the things I can now do with greater ease.  They write notes after I post my blog that make me feel like I can go another week, another day or another hour and not give up my focus.

Is it my family who have been with me all all along?? They in some cases have been the reflection in the mirror I did not want to see.  They have had the tough talks with me.  They have felt my pain. I think at times they had given up on me not because they wanted to but I don't think they knew how to help without causing me additional hurt. They have known most intimately....... the fat Donna, the Donna suffering with her weight and  the Donna who had given up on herself.  They still loved me but had no idea what to do or how to help.  They suggested diets and surgery and exercise and healthy eating options.  They even asked my friends to talk to me about my weight.

Pain, pain and more pain........it is a real physical pain......not just the hips and knees but the heart and soul.  You do begin to question your worth to yourself or anyone........

Someone once said, "you cannot move a grain of sand without changing the world." (I looked it up and for the life of me could not find who to credit it to.)

For me the grain of sand that moved was something that happened a little more than a year ago.......I read a post on FB from someone I knew in high school.  No, we were not best friends but more acquaintances in passing.  The post was about wanting to do new things at least once a month.

That brief post really got me thinking......I wanted to live my life not merely exist.  I didn't want to continue to say no to things.  I wanted to stop worrying about anything and everything.  No longer was I going to be a victim of my own doing........I wanted to be the hero of my story.

This week,  I passed the 60 pound mark.  It seemed like I hit the 50 pound loss ages ago but now I realize it doesn't matter how long it takes.  Like they say in our meeting "it is not a race......it is a journey". I know I have to focus on the 5 pounds at a time.  And even with those ugly plateau's  and the roller coaster ride this journey takes......I know I am in it this time until I get to my goal.......not WW goal (since I haven't weighed that much since high school...LOL) but my goal.

When I look back at this year so far I see so many more "yes's" in my life.  And while there are still changes coming and some of them are big changes, I see such a different person both inside and out now......

So while I have to thank my family, my friends, my WW buddies..............you all really have no choice.....you are stuck with me......

I really have to thank Deborah Ennis Duitch whose  FB post changed my life. That short post was a turning point for me in the right direction........and for that I will be eternally grateful to Deborah........

None of us ever know how our actions or words can change someones path .......it can get someone through a tough day.......or on a new road........simple words that can change lives......

Now my word is Yes.......and that is far better than all those No's I have said along the way.........

Oh and for your entertainment.....I had Jenn take 2 pictures of me....just the face....LOL.....one from the front and the other profile......I think you will see the differences between that and a photo from 2 years ago.......

two years ago.......

and today.......

........and for laughs here is a profile shot (please ignore the long scar from the side of my eye.......the Dr. at the hospital insisted it would be come part of my laugh lines or crows feet.......whatever).....I just wanted you all to see my more defined neck....LOL

See you next week.................