Christmas in July

As Charles Dickens wrote, " I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year through."

I know, I know, I make people crazy about Christmas.

For some people, the season starts the day after Halloween. For others, it's Thanksgiving night or the day after Thanksgiving.  Others wait until December 24th.

Then there are the "crazy for Christmas" people of which I am one.

Our Christmas season starts early, very early.

Like in July.

Hallmark has been on the bandwagon for a couple of years.

We picked up our Hallmark ornament books in early May.

For the 10th anniversary of Hallmark Christmas, they have been running a Christmas movie every Thursday and Friday night all through this year.

 Also,  Hallmark has  Christmas in July with 24/7 movies from June 28th through to July 28th.  Four weeks in the middle of the year to get in the holiday spirit.

Surprisingly, the Lifetime Channel ran the movie, "Elf" last Friday night too.

Once the movies end on July 28th, there are only 13 weeks until I  know I can watch a Christmas movie any time of the day.  Nirvana !

I also notice during a commercial break from "Elf" Lifetime is now going to show Christmas movies starting in October. 

I am sure these channel are not just doing this for my benefit.

This week on July 4th, Jenn and I will be making Christmas ornaments as we have every 4th of July for the last 30 years. I wish I had taken pictures of our projects from each year.

It is easy to forget it is July sitting in the house with the central air running.

You will note, I have not mentioned presents.  Yes, I do keep a running list through out the year as ideas pop into my head but Christmas is not all about the gifts. 

It's about the way the holidays make you feel.

That also means there is a bit of melancholy in the air too. 

The same way my mind wanders back to those amazing Christmas's past, I also think back on the summer holidays from years back.

Family and friends gatherings with the grill going during the day. Everyone heading to see the fireworks.  Many years, we watched them in a local cemetery (yes, cemetery) with our friends.  Blankets spread out, coolers opened that were filled with cold beverages as the conversation flowed until the first sights and sounds of the colorful light displays could be seen.  The group chorus's of "ooh's and ah's" with each explosion.

And the year when my Dad was not well enough to join us.  He and Mom stayed home.  When we came back to the house after the fireworks, they told us how they could hear the cracking and popping of the fireworks.  Dad closed his eyes as he told us what he heard. It was clear in his mind he could visualize what was going on in town.

The ache of missing those that shared the holidays with us is not only tied to Thanksgiving and Christmas. We can have that same sense of loss in July too.

I guess whether it be Dec 25th or July 4th, we need to celebrate for those we have in our lives, those we have lost and savor the memories, as we make new memories too.

Thanks Hallmark for reminding me of how blessed I have been.  I need to remember that on the tough days when life might be a little more of a struggle.

Happy July 4th !!!

And an early Merry Christmas!!

See you next week.

No surprise here.....it's about Dads/Fathers Day

Everyone has a Father.

Not everyone has a Dad.

Dad and Father, worlds apart in definition and the way they approach the role of a parent.

A Father makes the obvious biological contribution.

A Dad helps mold you into the person you end up being.  Values, advice, dependable, encouraging are just part of the requirements of being a good Dad.

Dad's are there every day and that means so much.  It teaches commitment and responsibility.

Dad's have the ability to share disappointment without destruction.

Fathers often use cruelty or verbal abuse as a tool for the frustrations they may have in their own lives and upbringing. They build themselves up while tearing down the people they should care about the most.

The scars can fade but never completely disappear  Yes, children forgive but don't forget.

Having no regrets about the ability to tear someone down and moving on as if nothing has happened is what a Father does not a Dad.

Dad's don't remind you of what they had to give up for you.  What child wants to hear  "if it wasn't for you I could have....".  Fathers will say those words. Dad’s don’t.

Dad's don't have to get angry.  They can say something as simple as "I am disappointed in you" and the impact is huge.

Dad's want you to succeed and they celebrate it with you.

It is easy to be a Father.  It takes work to be a Dad.

It is a shame the Father's don't realize they missed the boat.  They missed the relationships, the true love of a child versus the obligatory/forced love a child feels they must express but truly do not feel.

Those with Fathers are sometimes fortunate to have a Dad come into their lives.

Thanks to the Dad's.

Our children's lives are so much richer because of you.

Happy Dad's Day !!

See you next week!!

The Curve Balls

Sunday is bill day in my house.

The bills are juggled and sorted by balance, due date and priority.

It is like shuffling a deck of cards.

I gave up cable for Hulu and Netfilx.

I watch the number of GB I use on my cell phone each month.  I do not want extra fees.

I use Gas Buddy to find the lowest price in gas.

I head to Publix and CVS for the BOGO sales.

I use my toothpaste and shampoo to the last drop. Yes, I do add water to the shampoo bottle to get that one extra wash of my hair.

Soda has been replaced by water which saves a lot of money.

When I leave the house each week for my two night stay in Lexington, I turn off the central air.

I can't remember the last time I paid full price for any clothing.  I wait for the sales.

I drive to the landfill versus paying for trash pickup.

I now have a car payment, I am saving a lot on gas as my new car is more fuel efficient.

I plan my meals and don't mind eating soup three to four times a week.

I use a K cup for two cups of coffee vs. one.

With all these choices, I can get by,

But like with most people, it is the unplanned events that can throw the finances into a tailspin.

In the last  few months, it was car repair bills and frequent oil changes due to the high mileage on my old vehicle.

Laying out cash until I hit the deductible on my medical coverage or the $400 out of pocket for my eyeglasses.  There is the $235 per month out of pocket for my maintenance inhaler for my asthma. These are not items included in my monthly budget.

But still I manage to make it work as I move the money around like a dealer in Vegas.

I just paid to have my dryer vent cleaned out.  I always have a fear of a fire due to all of the "stuff" that accumulates in that long hose out of the house.

I know it is important to have regular maintenance checks on appliances and systems in the house.

Then you notice water on the living room ceiling in not one but four spots.  Call the A/C man, and it appears the pan under the unit is rusted very badly and now has holes.

Options are a smaller amount to have the old unit taken down, the pan replaced and the unit reinstalled. Or bite the bullet and get a new unit.  After a few phone calls for advice, I opted to go for the new unit to replace the 15 year old one.

Up bright and early Saturday.  Installation starts at 7:30 and by 9:45, voila it's all done.

If I had any idea this big bill was going to be rolling in, I might not have bought the new kitchen appliances or the new car.  While the appliances that were replaced were not broken at 30 years old they had pretty much reached the end of their economic life.  The new car replaced a 12 year old car with over 200,000 miles, oil changes every 5 weeks and repair bills that were adding up.

Common sense decisions but yes, I am second guessing those decisions based on the bill for this weeks HVAC replacement.

Well, once again it is Sunday and I am shuffling the bills looking for a "royal straight flush" instead of  "a pair of deuces".

Somehow I will make it work, I always have up until now.

Time to deal the cards and hope no new unexpected surprises surface at least for this week.

See you next week.

We grew up with the same parents

I have spent the last few days with two of my siblings.

Now that the weekend is over, I started to think about my two brothers and sister.  We are all so different.

How can 4 individuals with the same DNA and same parents turn out so differently?

George and I shared the various places my parents called home for about 16 years. Then he went off and joined the Marines.

Cheryl and I shared a room for 19 years. She left to get married.

Greg and I lived under the same roof for 16 years. I finally moved out when I got married.

My poor parents put up with me for 26 years.  I was with them longer than any of my siblings.

George and Greg's time together was the shortest. Just a scant 6 years.

It is the first time I realized that fact, just 6 years together.

Makes me sad as I have memories that are about all of us.  But they really were not about all of us, it was some part of the family not all of the Raboni's.

Now that I think of it, maybe we were in fact raised by different parents.

George, Cheryl and I were the children of the "hungry years" for my parents.  They didn't have much money as Dad worked and went to school.  And Mom had us kids, 24/7.

Greg came along the year before Dad finished Law School.

Greg had more time with Dad as he was home more.  No longer in school or working 2 jobs. But he also had the shortest period of time since Dad was gone when Greg was 19.

There was also more money for life in general.  During the short few years when we were all together, there were camping trips across county and vacations at the Jersey Shore.

But looking back in retrospect, those 6 overlapping years were all we truly had as a family living together.

Not much time.

No wonder our memories are so different.

No wonder we look at our parents from different viewpoints.

We either had the parents who were young and inexperienced or the parent who knew his time was running out. Too soon.

I wish Dad had gotten to know his grandchildren as Mom did. I wish he could have been there for their graduations as Mom was.  I wish he could have seen his children grow up, raise their families and become individuals not just George and Irene's kids.

My siblings took very different paths.  Greg did the physical work.  George, a police officer.  Cheryl worked in schools and day care centers always spending time with children.  I was the only one who had a traditional "office" job with various financial institutions.

The four of us have caught up with each other at one time or another over the last 7 years.  But one of us has always been missing.

Life has gotten in the way.

Last week, I heard this said " Days are long but years are short." The Goldberg's TV show.

I need to be better at making sure to see my siblings and enjoy the time I have with them.

We all need to be better about seeing each other. George and Irene would agree.


See you next week.