The Challenge of this Blog......

Last week I had writers block.........

I couldn't think of anything worth you spending a few minutes reading.  It's funny some weeks I get a lot of hits for my posts and other weeks a lot less.  I am not sure what makes someone want to read what I have written or look at it and say "Nah.... not this week",

When I first started to write this blog 3 years ago, it was only going to be about me trying to get healthy, going to the gym and what I was doing to put me first. All of those things are still important to me.  BUT what I have found is that this blog has evolved into my dream job.......I would love to write a weekly column in a newspaper only I am too late for that.......no longer do you see a columns like Erma Bombeck's talking about everyday life. 

I have started to work on what I hope will turn into a novel.  IT IS FICTION!! If you see a first name you recognize or a place you have visited it doesn't mean I am writing about you.  I am also still seeking a venue for my shorter creations such as magazines, online newspapers and such.

During the week if I come up with something I think will be good for my blog, I put a note on my IPhone so I don't forget.  Sometimes I save a topic for a later date.....until I am ready to share it with you.  It is weird I am willing to share the funny things I get myself into but struggle with the painful entries.  I am willing to make an ass out of myself and let you join in the laughter but when I write an entry and I end up crying......I am not looking for your pity.  I am just trying to keep it as real as I can since I promised myself I would be as honest as I dared.  Up to now I think I have been pretty true to that plan.

I have written about my exploits at the gym, my struggle to lose weight, my lack of grace (OK the fact that I am clumsy)......I have shared about loss of loved ones and the ending of relationships.......there have been weeks when I went on about memories and reunions. 

I have stepped much further out of my comfort zone than I ever intended when I wrote my first post.  By sharing with you I have grown, I have challenged myself and I have save a zillion hours on a therapist couch........

Just one more thing........

Tomorrow is my sister's birthday.......
when we were young we were very different......and I guess the same can be said about us as adults.  Cheryl wants to save the world......she is the champion for the poor, the homeless and there has never been a animal she didn't love.  I on the other hand am more cautious.  I will help one person at a time while she will try to save a whole family.  I have owned one dog at time and would never think of having two. She will give you the shirt off her back while I will give you a shirt I didn't really want (OK how shallow am I).  She has been a second Mom to Jenn and their mutual admiration society is sometimes nauseating.......as they say it is all about them!!!! Cheryl will talk about how much she loved her freshman year in high school because I was a senior and she knew all my friends.  I didn't think it was a big deal but then she told me how much she hated going back to school her sophomore year and my group had moved on.  We make each other crazy at times as sisters often do but we also have those moments when we share with each other something going on in our lives and we each try to find the right words to say.  We have had fist fights growing up and probably screamed at each other a zillion times over who's turn it was to do the dishes. But yet for some reason one of my favorite memories with her was when I was about 8 months pregnant and she came and spent the afternoon with  me in my apartment.  It wasn't a major event....just two sisters having lunch in a one bedroom apartment.  We ate ham, provolone, peppers and eggplant sandwiches. Funny, I am not sure why that afternoon stands out in my mind.  Maybe because she was a Mom and I was going to be one........maybe because we had finally found the things we had in common and not what we had that was different.....but somehow that afternoon changed things for me as far as our relationship.......it made us close.

Happy Birthday Cheryl!!!!! Love your "older" "big" sister!!!!