Finding the right words

There is so much I want to say and yet I am unsure how to put the words down.

Here goes.

Last weekend, all I could think about was having the day off on Monday.

Sleeping late, binge watching some shows on Netflix and recharging my batteries for the week ahead.  

The dreaded week coming up in the mortgage department, month end.

Monday arrived and I was relishing the day.

Until I turned on the news.

Shocked by what I was seeing.

Hearing what had taken place left me feeling a range of emotions from anger to sadness.

Like most people, I was horrified.

I have heard several times this week, the thing a good police officer hates is a bad police officer.  My brother was a police officer for 30 years.  He and his fellow officers were fair, understanding and treated people with respect.  

There was no doubt that from what I saw the police officer who committed the unforgivable act  should be charged with murder,

I still can’t believe that several officers stood there and took no action to stop what was going on.

They should and I would expect will be charged too.

My opinion seems to be universal.  I have not heard any thoughts to the contrary,

Peaceful protest, absolutely.

Rioting and looting, I do not understand.

How does this right the wrong?

Watching the events the last few nights has been upsetting, unnerving and questions my beliefs.

I want to believe that I am a good person and respect all people.

Am I perfect, far from it.

Do I believe in the Golden Rule, yes.

Do I want to live in a world where we treat each other fairly, of course,

Does my heart break for the family of George Floyd, yes.

Do I want to see those responsible brought to justice, yes.

Do I want to see those taking advantage of what are supposed to be peaceful protests as an opportunity to destroy businesses and loot held accountable, yes.

I didn’t realize how much I was letting all that has gone on impact me until I started to feel physically ill and found myself crying as I stayed glued to the News.

2020 continues to be a challenge.

Pandemic/virus.

Job losses.

And now the killing of a man who didn’t deserve to die.

Good police officers being treated with hate.  How do they get up and go to work each day knowing what lies ahead of them during their shift?

The only solutions I can see right now is to think about how we treat each other and pray.

Pray for all of us since I know of no one who hasn’t been effected (or is it affected) in one way or another.

Yes, I know some have been impacted far greater than I.

We can all do some soul searching and try to be better people tomorrow.

For tomorrow is all we have,  giving us the chance to start and make the world a better place.

See you next week.