Entry # 400 !!!!!

I can't believe this is my 400th entry!!!!! How did that happen?? I remember when I hit #100 and thought that was a lot......WOW!!

I started this blog 2 years ago this month. I am always talking about passion in life and this is one of my true passions. I think my feelings come through in my entries. You have shared this walk with me....through my ups and downs. I have gone from being afraid to share to baring my soul (well almost all of it....there are still something I just elude to but don't come right out and say).

The original premise of this blog was to write about my weight loss and getting healthier journey. This is still true but as you know if you have followed this blog from it's inception I have gotten into other topics that are part of my life. I have written about my dreams, changes I have experienced, frustration with others, my search for peace, love and happiness. I have come to understand that although I know I still need to shed pounds and continue to work out and eat healthier that is not the answer to all I need.

I try not to say "it's too late", I do say "What if" more often. Do I still want to be published? YES. Do I still feel I have a chance to see my dreams become reality? YES. Do I believe in me? YES. Would I have said all of that a few years ago? NO.

I still do give some people too much power over me and let their words hurt me. Hey, I didn't say I was 100% perfect. Like I have said many times before I am a work in progress.

BUT I have learned how lucky I am to have wonderful friends who are supportive and cheer me on. I am grateful to have a daughter who I can laugh with and who pushes me when I struggle. I know how to love others......I am learning how to love and like me....warts and all......

So I hope you will hang in there while I move along this long and winding road.......it has no end.....and that is not a bad thing......it just means I continue to evolve into the Donna I want to be......so here is to number 401 and 402 and 403 and on and on.....

There is a book in all of this or at least a monthly article in a magazine or a weekly column in a newspaper.........I am sure.....I just have to find the right person to believe in me and my story......am I shooting too high......I don't think so.....do I sound cocky? I don't mean too......you know what that statement about a book is? That is me finally feeling confident about something I do......well it only took 400 entries.....and if that is what it took.....it was worth every word.....

A Good Day

I fell asleep in the living room recliner last night.....I woke up at 5:30 A.M. to a tornado warning not far from where we are......OK not a tornado watch but a tornado warning. I didn't feel I could go to sleep in my room until the "warning" period was over.

I woke up at 9:00 to Jeter barking. It turns out he had been barking much earlier and Jenn was letting him play on the bedroom side of the house. I didn't know my bedroom door was closed so I was a little confused at first as to why his barking sounded so far away. I relaxed in my bedroom recliner while I flipped channels. Then Jenn came in and said the dreaded words...."What time do you want to go to the gym?" I was not thrilled. I had a headache and was moving slowly. In a very biting response I said, "I will be ready in 15 minutes!!" I was ready pretty close to that time and off we went to the gym in the rain. When we got there the pool was full of activity.....there were people sharing the lap lanes and there were even people doing laps on the open side of the pool. I grabbed my little corner of the pool and began to jog. I have had a hard time judging how long to jog fast and how long to jog slow. I decided to pray while I jogged. The short prayer I would jog slowly, the long prayer I would jog fast. Before I knew it my time in the pool was over and I hadn't looked at the clock on the wall once. And yes I had to admit I was glad we had gone......once it was over. We are definitely back into our regular work out schedule.

After the gym it was home to have something quick to eat (flat bread with turkey pepperoni and cheese(just one slice)). Remember it was now 12:45 and I had not had anything to eat yet today. Next off to a Pampered Chef party. I am so glad I went. I saw some friend from my old job. I thought we would stay maybe two hours instead we ended up being the last guests to leave. We laughed a lot and that felt wonderful.

Then back home to read, watch some DVR'd shows and blogging. Jenn just finished some of the ironing and I will finish up the rest.

It doesn't sound like a day that would be great but it was. I am glad I went to the gym.......I am glad I saw some friends.......and I know what they mean about laughter being good for the soul. I haven't laughed that much in ages and just thinking about it makes me smile.

Tomorrow it is back to the gym, bake a crumb cake for the office and maybe make Weight Watchers Pumpkin Muffins for the week. I am going to try and get my WW points set for the week.

Back to today.....nothing spectacular happened but it was just the right mix of fun and work. It was a good day.....

Writing Myself Notes.....

Sometimes when I am at home I think of something I have to do the next day at work. I will either send myself an e-mail or leave myself a message at work. I will also do the reverse if I am at the office and need to remember to do something at home. There used to be times when I would pick up groceries at lunch. If I had to put some of them in the refrig in the office, I would put my car keys in the bag with them. This way I couldn't leave the office without them. I will admit there were times when I got out to my car and ripped my pocketbook apart before I would realize my keys were in the office refrig with those damn groceries.

Oh and I am a list maker....I have a list for everything....from the ingredients for a recipe or the date bills have to be paid or appointments I have to make or a list of appointments coming up.....chances are in my pocketbook there will be several lists going at the same time.....sometimes I will combine the lists on to one piece of paper. I also have a small notebook in my pocketbook. It has lists of things I want to do around my house......major things. It lists classes I would like to take and songs I want to buy for my IPOD. It has ideas for Christmas gifts.

Well now for the 2nd time in recent months I have forgotten to bring underwear to the gym.....how many times am I going to have to leave the gym pantiless???? I don't really want to start leaving notes around that say bring underwear to gym......

I don't believe my memory is going.....I just think I have too many things going on at the same time.....right.....of course right......so what is the big deal about making lists.....or e-mailing myself.......or leaving myself a voice mail.....when I start to wonder who sent the e-mails or left the voice mail messages then I will worry until then.....I should just buy stock in post-it notes.....

$29 was all I needed.....

Was life really easier or do I just remember it that way???? I was given a stereo for Christmas when I was in high school. It was very cool. It had two speakers, a turntable and all the AM and FM radio stations. Oh and it had a 8 track player. You could stack up albums so they would play one after the other. And when the stereo needle started to wear out you could either go buy some more needles to pop in or if you had to wait to make that purchase ....you could tape a quarter to the arm and that would weigh it down enough that you could still listen to the music. When I tell Jenn I grew up in a time where we had only 6 TV stations, the stations went off the air and the test pattern appeared for hours and the viewing day ended and started with patriotic music.....even I think I sound old...LOL. Now I have a zillion channels and I have a hard time finding something to watch. My brother and I used to be so desperate to watch TV when we were small we would watch anything.....when the stations came on at 5:00 A.M. we would watch Sunrise Semester and Modern Farmer......I knew more about Trig and agriculture (including rotating crops) at the age of 4 than most adults. I remember my dad taking small TV tubes down the street to the candy store to the machine to test if the tubes were good. The worst thing was if the tv repairman had to make a visit. And no one wanted to hear the dreaded words "the picture tube was shot". A few months ago one of our tv's died. We took it to the recycling center (can't just leave them out by the curb anymore). From there we went to Target and bought another one......all in a matter of a few hours. This was the first time I had a flat screen tv. When my friend asked how I like the quality of the HD I told him I didn't see a big difference. Turns out I didn't have the HD cord so I wouldn't have seen a difference.....LOL.....

When I had my first job at Bambergers ( a Macy's affiliate) I made $29 after taxes for 15 hours work a week. I was just about to start my senior year in High School. I worked Tuesday and Thursday nights and all day Saturday. I drove a 1969 green pinto, bought my jeans at a place call OHM (they also sold pipes and rolling papers....LOL), and the $29 I earned paid for my gas, jeans, cigarettes (I know I know it was bad for me) and car insurance. Oh it also paid for my social activities.....which basically meant it paid the cover charge at the bars and for drinks. Was it really as easy as I remember.......probably not. Am I showing my age......probably.

An Almost Perfect Sunday.....

I started my day at the gym. In the pool by 10:00 and no children in sight. Jog, jog, jog. Bob went a to a USC baseball game which meant peace and quiet in the house for a few hours. I downloaded some songs no one but me would care about or remember. Got the veggies steamed. Ironing done. Blog entries done and it's only 5:30 which means the Sunday paper will be read on Sunday (this doesn't always happen). If I had just squeezed in a nap this day would have been nirvana.....oh well at least I am going into Monday feeling like I accomplished a lot today.

My biggest decision for the rest of the day is do I watch the Amazing Race or The Academy Awards......

I will probably go with Billy Crystal......he can be very funny......and I can always DVR the Amazing Race.....well wasn't that an easy decision to make..... I can only hope all my decisions are that easy this week.....I am so in a zone......time to buy a lottery ticket......OK maybe not.....LOL.....too bad every day can't be this easy.....

Sukiyaki and more.....

I love my Ipod. Today, I purchased 15 songs.....yes 15 songs. They range from Bobby Vinton, The Vogues, Leslie Gore and on and on. I have been making a list of "old" songs that I love.....Mr. Sandman bring me a dream....I think the new commercial that has that song got me started with the "old songs". Jenn was very patient as she showed me once again how to purchase the songs and load them on to my IPod. While I listen to the instrumental version of the theme to A Summer Place for some reason it makes me smile. My parents had a "record player" and I remember as a youngster listening to a mix of music. From the Big Bands, to Vera Lynn, to Joanie James with some Mathis and Mario Lanza thrown in. My grandmother had a hi-fi system. This was a major piece of furniture.....it had speaker on each side, a turntable and on the other side a radio.....the cover for the turntable slid over so you could stack up some albums.

When ever I hear Dean Martin sign "Everybody Loves Somebody Sometime" I am transported back to the Bronx. I am in the 4th or 5th grade. It's Friday night and Dad takes us to a restaurant (pizzeria with a dining room in the back) on Tremont Avenue. Sometimes we went in the car other times we walked. I wish I could remember the name of the place. We would sit at a long table and have a few pies and soda. This was a major treat for us. And Dean Martin or Frank Sinatra were always being played on the juke box........nice memory......I think we did this during Lent when meat was a no-no on Friday's. Hard to believe that was over 40 years ago.

OK by now you might be wondering about the Sukiyaki part of the title of this entry. I remember this song so clearly when we went to visit my grandparents in California. Riding in my grandmother's Country Squire station wagon and that song on the radio. My Mom and her sister's trying to master the new dance "The Mashed Potato".....LOL.

My Grandmother made sushi from scratch. It was wonderful. She made it in sushi cones which I believe are now referred to a "nouri". I talked to the lady who make sushi at Publix. She knew exactly what I was talking about and told me if I called in advance she would make them for me.....yum. ( Not high in the calorie dept either....LOL).

Sukiyaki and sushi.....takes me back in time to a place where you watched your parents dance and laugh.....forever young.......

Thank You For The Feedback

Last week I think some of my entries were subconsciously asking for feedback.

I appreciate the fact that some of you commented on my postings. I actually heard from more of you than I expected. That was a nice surprise. Anytime someone takes the time to call, text, e-mail or message me with their thoughts I love it. Since so many of you have such a variety of life experiences your feedback is not only varied but also gives me a lot to think about.

Please keep those cards and letters coming in......knowing that you are reading and are taking the time to share your thoughts with me means a lot. You never know when something you share with me may end up in one of my blog entries. Don't worry.....I will never reveal anything embarrassing about anyone except myself......promise!!!