What I Want At My Funeral

I have given this some thought.......about when I die.  How do I want things handled?  What is important to me?

I have made it known I want to be cremated.  There will be none of that "She looked like she was sleeping" or " She looked good".  Hey, I am dead how good can I look?????

As just about everyone knows.....I love cheese.  My sister has promised to throw some cheese in my casket so when I head to the big toaster I can go out as a grilled cheese!!!! I love it!!!!

I have a poem about cheese I want read at my funeral.  I am not sure If I want a traditional funeral or just something at the funeral home.

The reception after the funeral......if you don't want to laugh then don't show up.  I want laughter and lots of it.  I think I have given people plenty of material over the years so it is OK if it turns into a roast about me (no pun intended).

Oh and as far a the service......it will start 10 minutes late.......I usually run late so why should my final event go off on time.

Pictures of me are allowed at the funeral home but please try to find some that are flattering.....not my drivers license photo or any of me sitting down....LOL and definitely none in a bathing suit. 

As each guest leaves the reception or luncheon after I am gone there will be a parting gift.....a bag of assorted cheeses.

 And I will be asking my family to take some of my ashes and bring them to places I like or would have liked to visit. 

But if there are any tears from anything but laughter I am going to get very pissed......