The week before I headed north I was feeling such a mix of emotions. I was looking forward to seeing the family but was sad the person who would have enjoyed the family reunion the most would not be there. I knew in order to have closure I had to say goodbye in my own way.
In what I consider a stroke of genius, Peter, the Funeral Director gave my siblings and me the opportunity to come to the funeral home the morning of the Memorial Service. There was something so right about just the four of us getting to spend some time alone with Mom. When we walked in the room it was finally real. There on a small table was the box with her ashes. It was a beautiful wood box with small carvings on it. There were also three small containers with some of Mom's ashes for my siblings and the wind chimes with some of Mom's ashes for me. As I looked at George, Greg and Cheryl, I knew life was as it should be.....children bury their parents. I was grateful to have that time alone .....just us four.
The cemetery where my parents are buried is high up on a hill that at the top overlooks the Hudson River. My parents are not at the very top but it is still a long winding road up to where they are. As we rounded the last bend at the top of the hill, we were all surprised at the view........there were people all over........for Mom.
The ceremony was very simple. My older brother started with some words about Mom and a reading he selected, I follow with my thoughts and another reading, my sister followed expressing her feelings, some friends from Mom's church spoke about Mom's faith, Jenn read the 23rd Psalm and then there were yellow balloons released to represent each of the grandchildren and greatgrandchildren.
Before, we left my younger brother took the shovel from the Funeral Director and covered Mom's ashes.
Simple, warm and full of love......a service of which Mom would have approved. Some tears, some laughter and surrounded by loved ones......perfect.
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