It is hard for me to see some people being much more successful than me each week. I have been working at this weight loss/healthier lifestyle change for a year. Where am I now? Weight down, more active and have made so many changes in my eating habits. But each week I sit and watch people get up at Weight Watchers who have lost so much more than me. In some cases, in less time. I am sure I could come up with a list as long as my arm as to why this is such a slow process for me. I think part of it is because I need to really learn about food, fitness and good health. In the past, I have also gotten a little cocky when the weight starts coming off quickly. Then I also start to think.....I can do this by myself....and we all know where that got me in the past......weight back up and higher than where I began.
Not this time....
I know I need to focus on myself and not worry about how others are doing. It gets hard sometimes when I know how much I need to lose to get to my goal weight...... At Weight Watchers, they tell you to think 5 pounds at a time and it makes sense......if I think about how far I have to go......I would quit now.
Here is a very cool quote: “So many of our dreams at first seems impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.” - Christopher Reeve
OK I am summoning the will......hopefully the rest will follow......
Sunday, January 30, 2011
It Is Not Cheap Eating Healthy....
I find it frustrating that to eat healthy costs a lot more than to not eat healthy. A box of Mac and Cheese 34 cents. A head of cabbage.....99 cents pound !!! I wanted cabbage today for my steamer but decided against it since there were no small heads and the sign said that ridiculous price. I was not about to spend $5.00 on a head of cabbage. Just to buy the foods for my steamer costs a small mint. Add up the cost of mushrooms, broccoli, asparagus, squash, celery and shrimp.....it gets pricey but what choice do I have? Why on earth would a veggie omelet cost $2 more because I asked for egg whites vs. eggs? Fruit is another hot button.....I buy a bowl of fruit each week so I can have some variety but it is not cheap. I can't wait for the summer and fall when a lot of this produce is in season and the prices go down. Strawberries will be in season before you know it....yum.....
I guess part of the problem is I am buying for 2 families....one family member likes things I really can't and/or shouldn't eat. In order to keep peace in the house, I have to shop for both and then figure out a way to make it work for all of us.
So, if I want a burger I can go to the golden arches and get it for 99 cents but a salad costs a few dollars....it is any wonder so many people are ....obese....fat....have health issues. Gym membership, trainer, weight watchers, healthier foods.....there is no way around it. If I want to be healthy and live longer I have to pay the piper.
Time to put the veggies in the steamer.....sure not going to waste them.....that would be like lighting a match to my money and those of you who know me well....know that would just make me crazy....
I guess part of the problem is I am buying for 2 families....one family member likes things I really can't and/or shouldn't eat. In order to keep peace in the house, I have to shop for both and then figure out a way to make it work for all of us.
So, if I want a burger I can go to the golden arches and get it for 99 cents but a salad costs a few dollars....it is any wonder so many people are ....obese....fat....have health issues. Gym membership, trainer, weight watchers, healthier foods.....there is no way around it. If I want to be healthy and live longer I have to pay the piper.
Time to put the veggies in the steamer.....sure not going to waste them.....that would be like lighting a match to my money and those of you who know me well....know that would just make me crazy....
What a workout !!!
Thursday night I met Carol at the gym. We started with 10 minutes on the elliptical (yeah!!!). We moved to the stepper including a riser. What happens when I take my first step.....I catch my sneaker. In my head I am thinking....OMG....I am going to fall....the 2nd riser is too much.....red alert, red alert Donna is a klutz.....she broke her arm a few years ago tripping over a basketball at a basketball game!!!! Carol just stood there looked at me, made sure the risers were properly placed and even jumped on it for good measure. So I take my first step and surprise, surprise, surprise....I make it up and down and up and down and up and down.....over and over again. Then we move to the weights....some of those suckers were really heavy!!! Back to the stepper....tap, tap, climb, climb..... Breathe through your nose not your mouth. Why oh why is that so hard to do??? I inhale and exhale but the nose thing is such an effort. By the time the workout is done.....I am not only dripping with sweat but I am also pretty proud of myself. Except for drinking water and stopping to wipe off the sweat, I have kept moving the whole time.
Carol thinks I probably burned a few hundred calories. Weight Watchers gives you credit for "activity" (they don't use the word exercise). I don't add those in to my daily points for extra food. I just consider it calories burned.
I am hoping to get to the gym at least 4 maybe 5 times this week ( I am off Monday so that makes it easier). A couple of times in the pool (since they regulated the temp) and a few sessions on the elliptical. I have to focus on calorie burn....
This week Weight Watchers talked about alternatives to getting your activity points in.....parking the car farther away from where ever you are going, stairs vs. elevator....
I am going to try the stair thing....it is only 2 flights at the office but 2 flights everyday....sometimes more than once a day. And I will make every effort to not drive around the parking lot (no matter where I am) again and again looking for a closer spot.
I will TRY.....but if you see me in the elevator or pulling into an up front parking spot.....no pointing at me and saying "I thought you were going to....."
OK so that is my new goal....more steps....walking and climbing....no specific number....just more each day than I usually do.....I am trying....really trying......really....
Carol thinks I probably burned a few hundred calories. Weight Watchers gives you credit for "activity" (they don't use the word exercise). I don't add those in to my daily points for extra food. I just consider it calories burned.
I am hoping to get to the gym at least 4 maybe 5 times this week ( I am off Monday so that makes it easier). A couple of times in the pool (since they regulated the temp) and a few sessions on the elliptical. I have to focus on calorie burn....
This week Weight Watchers talked about alternatives to getting your activity points in.....parking the car farther away from where ever you are going, stairs vs. elevator....
I am going to try the stair thing....it is only 2 flights at the office but 2 flights everyday....sometimes more than once a day. And I will make every effort to not drive around the parking lot (no matter where I am) again and again looking for a closer spot.
I will TRY.....but if you see me in the elevator or pulling into an up front parking spot.....no pointing at me and saying "I thought you were going to....."
OK so that is my new goal....more steps....walking and climbing....no specific number....just more each day than I usually do.....I am trying....really trying......really....
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Facing the Scales...
After the last 2 disastrous weigh-ins, I was concerned about how I would do this week. On the way to my meeting, once again I thought about what would be a good weight loss? If I am down anything at all would be OK...not!! I have been working so hard I needed to see a good number. I had weighed myself during the week on that dreaded scale I bought a few weeks back (see post about buying a scale for the house). It kept showing I was down but it had shown that last week and we all know how that turned out....
I have been really focusing on veggies, veggies, veggies and fruit, fruit fruit.
Please dear God let me not have gained again !!!!!!
Whew.....I was down at the scales....and a good amount!!!!
I know that I keep saying it is not all about the scale....AND IT IS NOT....but at least I didn't see the number going up.
I shared my blog entry from last week with my meeting leader, Kay. I will love getting her feedback.
The new program still poses some challenges....this week I found out the Egg Drop Soup that used to be 1 point per cup is now 3 points per cup. The point value on steamed dumplings has gone up too.....I have to remember to check EVERYTHING I eat to make sure I know the points values....I cannot assume any more....
Well at least for the day.....I felt positive....the problem is.....I am only a week away from my next weigh in.....
I have been really focusing on veggies, veggies, veggies and fruit, fruit fruit.
Please dear God let me not have gained again !!!!!!
Whew.....I was down at the scales....and a good amount!!!!
I know that I keep saying it is not all about the scale....AND IT IS NOT....but at least I didn't see the number going up.
I shared my blog entry from last week with my meeting leader, Kay. I will love getting her feedback.
The new program still poses some challenges....this week I found out the Egg Drop Soup that used to be 1 point per cup is now 3 points per cup. The point value on steamed dumplings has gone up too.....I have to remember to check EVERYTHING I eat to make sure I know the points values....I cannot assume any more....
Well at least for the day.....I felt positive....the problem is.....I am only a week away from my next weigh in.....
Lunch with the Ladies and Italian Lessons
As I try to focus on good things that are not always weight and health related here are two more from last week.....
It had been ages since I had lunch with Kathy, Debbie and Debra. Last Sunday, we finally met. The nice part about old friends is that you can just pick up your conversation mid-sentence. You can catch up and move forward all within a few minutes. As I shared with all of you last Saturday was not a great day for me. By Sunday, I was still struggling and not quite ready to move on. Did I want to go to lunch? Should I stay home and feel sorry for myself? I finally decided that lunch with the girls might be good for me. And it was....
The conversation moved from the kids, to Kathy's trip to Poland, to hair color, to the holidays......and on and on.....
Going to lunch with the girls.....just what the Dr. ordered. Can't wait to do it again !!!!
The second thing was starting Italian Lessons....
Can I speak a work of Italian? No
Can I understand a word of Italian? No
A very kind lady from the Sons of Italy has offered to teach Italian......free. Wednesday night, Jenn and I headed of to Marika's house. Most of you know this is way out of my comfort zone. Going to a strangers house to learn a foreign language. I was never the greatest student so I was a little intimdated. Off we went with our notebooks and Italian/English dictionary. We started off by going to the wrong house.....not the best start. There were 7 people present. All at varying skill levels but that was fine. Marika went over some history of the country and told us about where each of our families came from.....that was interesting. We began with the real basic....pronouncing vowels. I wrote as much as I could phonetically....it will make it easier for me later on. I also came home and ordered my textbook.....a big 75 cents....it cost more to ship it!!
I will keep you informed about my progress....this should be interesting!! A while back I posted I wanted to continue working out so I could go to Italy and be able to do all the walking required to really take in all that Italy offers. Well now I will be able to communicate while there...
To stand in front of Trevi Fountain.....to see the Sistine Chapel.....to climb into a gondola in Venice.....part of my dreams.....eating healthy and exercising will make it possible...and at least for today.....that is why I continue my journey....
Ciao....
It had been ages since I had lunch with Kathy, Debbie and Debra. Last Sunday, we finally met. The nice part about old friends is that you can just pick up your conversation mid-sentence. You can catch up and move forward all within a few minutes. As I shared with all of you last Saturday was not a great day for me. By Sunday, I was still struggling and not quite ready to move on. Did I want to go to lunch? Should I stay home and feel sorry for myself? I finally decided that lunch with the girls might be good for me. And it was....
The conversation moved from the kids, to Kathy's trip to Poland, to hair color, to the holidays......and on and on.....
Going to lunch with the girls.....just what the Dr. ordered. Can't wait to do it again !!!!
The second thing was starting Italian Lessons....
Can I speak a work of Italian? No
Can I understand a word of Italian? No
A very kind lady from the Sons of Italy has offered to teach Italian......free. Wednesday night, Jenn and I headed of to Marika's house. Most of you know this is way out of my comfort zone. Going to a strangers house to learn a foreign language. I was never the greatest student so I was a little intimdated. Off we went with our notebooks and Italian/English dictionary. We started off by going to the wrong house.....not the best start. There were 7 people present. All at varying skill levels but that was fine. Marika went over some history of the country and told us about where each of our families came from.....that was interesting. We began with the real basic....pronouncing vowels. I wrote as much as I could phonetically....it will make it easier for me later on. I also came home and ordered my textbook.....a big 75 cents....it cost more to ship it!!
I will keep you informed about my progress....this should be interesting!! A while back I posted I wanted to continue working out so I could go to Italy and be able to do all the walking required to really take in all that Italy offers. Well now I will be able to communicate while there...
To stand in front of Trevi Fountain.....to see the Sistine Chapel.....to climb into a gondola in Venice.....part of my dreams.....eating healthy and exercising will make it possible...and at least for today.....that is why I continue my journey....
Ciao....
The Sunday New York Times
A while ago I did a list of some good things from my week. Here is one from this week. And you know what I love about it? It is not weight or health related. Sometimes I have to remember to think about things other than what I am eating and how many calories I am burning.....
Last Sunday, I tried downloading the Sunday New York Times onto my Kindle. It cost a big 99 cents. I love the NY Times.....the Book Review, the Arts and Leisure section, the Travel section....
I know there are those of you who will remind me of their liberal slant....I know, I know. But there is something wonderful about reading a newspaper that uses big words that I have to look up!!! I am not being snobby or elitist.....there is just something comforting about sitting in my recliner and reading about far off places and controversial issues....like spending time with a good friend.
But now it is even better.....I can down load it in less than a minute and when I read the articles they are in order and complete. People complain because the Times Crossword puzzle isn't there....I never did it any way. Some complain the ads are not there....once again not an issue for me.
I only buy the Sunday edition because it usually takes me a week to read it all....LOL....that last statement shows you I am no rocket scientist....but the Sunday Times on my Kindle.....life is good !!!!
Last Sunday, I tried downloading the Sunday New York Times onto my Kindle. It cost a big 99 cents. I love the NY Times.....the Book Review, the Arts and Leisure section, the Travel section....
I know there are those of you who will remind me of their liberal slant....I know, I know. But there is something wonderful about reading a newspaper that uses big words that I have to look up!!! I am not being snobby or elitist.....there is just something comforting about sitting in my recliner and reading about far off places and controversial issues....like spending time with a good friend.
But now it is even better.....I can down load it in less than a minute and when I read the articles they are in order and complete. People complain because the Times Crossword puzzle isn't there....I never did it any way. Some complain the ads are not there....once again not an issue for me.
I only buy the Sunday edition because it usually takes me a week to read it all....LOL....that last statement shows you I am no rocket scientist....but the Sunday Times on my Kindle.....life is good !!!!
Encouragement......
Last week I asked the readers of this blog for encouragement. As you all know it had been a rough week. I came into my workspace and my friend Mary had taped up inspirational quotes all over the place. They came from such diverse people as FDR to Dr. Seuss to a few from unknown sources. It made me smile!! I am going to share these with you during some of my posts.
Today's entry......from Winston Churchill....
"If you are going through hell, keep going."
I love that.....
My hell as it were can be watching some people eat whatever they want and knowing that I will gain weight just watching them. Or it can be beating myself up when the results on Saturday are not what I think they should be. Or driving by a clothing store knowing buying off the rack is not an option for me (right now).
There are some things I can do something about and some will never change. I will always know people who will be able to eat whatever they like and won't gain an ounce....it is what it is.
I can do my best each week to workout and eat what is right.....some weeks the result will be good and other no matter how hard I try will not be good. I just have to get it in my head that as long as I do my best.....eventually I will be successful.
The part about buying off the rack....will come in time....and when it happens.....trust me...you will all know about it.....
To paraphrase Churchill (do I have nerve or what?)....I have been in my own personal hell (it was my own doing) but I am going to keep going and climb out....the steps out are labeled.....working out, eating healthy and believing....I have to fight this battle everyday.....didn't someone famous say "War is hell"....it sure is....
Today's entry......from Winston Churchill....
"If you are going through hell, keep going."
I love that.....
My hell as it were can be watching some people eat whatever they want and knowing that I will gain weight just watching them. Or it can be beating myself up when the results on Saturday are not what I think they should be. Or driving by a clothing store knowing buying off the rack is not an option for me (right now).
There are some things I can do something about and some will never change. I will always know people who will be able to eat whatever they like and won't gain an ounce....it is what it is.
I can do my best each week to workout and eat what is right.....some weeks the result will be good and other no matter how hard I try will not be good. I just have to get it in my head that as long as I do my best.....eventually I will be successful.
The part about buying off the rack....will come in time....and when it happens.....trust me...you will all know about it.....
To paraphrase Churchill (do I have nerve or what?)....I have been in my own personal hell (it was my own doing) but I am going to keep going and climb out....the steps out are labeled.....working out, eating healthy and believing....I have to fight this battle everyday.....didn't someone famous say "War is hell"....it sure is....
10 Minutes on the elliptical
Friday, I finally got on the elliptical again for the first time in months. Carol stood right next to me and told me what I was doing right and wrong. Every time I leaned forward she would point it out to me. I was also trying to go fast. Carol wants me to move at a steady pace not racing speed. From now on our time together will start and end with the elliptical. Ten minutes in the beginning and five minutes at the end. She says we will build up my time until I can get up to 1/2 hour. I was really sweating and breathing hard. We checked my heart rate several times. I asked her if I was going to die while it I was on the elliptical......she laughed and said no.
I have my marching orders. No getting on the elliptical without Carol .....right now. She has threatened to put a dowel in front of me to make sure I do not lean forward (wouldn't that be a pretty sight). Pace myself and keep my heart rate steady. I am hoping within a short period of time I will be able to use the elliptical every time I am at the gym. Sometimes as a beginning and ending and other times do all of my time at the gym on it.
I love the feeling of sweating (at the gym only).....I may look like crap since wet hair stuck to my head and a t-shirt that is stuck to me due to the sweat is not an attractive sight but for some reason the sweating makes me feel accomplished. Weird huh?
Each turn on the elliptical in my head I hear Cardio, Cardio, Cardio which to me equals calories, calories, calories......I have to believe this will make me more successful in my quest for good health......and that's what it's all about (no I am not doing the hokey pokey while typing those last few words)!!
I have my marching orders. No getting on the elliptical without Carol .....right now. She has threatened to put a dowel in front of me to make sure I do not lean forward (wouldn't that be a pretty sight). Pace myself and keep my heart rate steady. I am hoping within a short period of time I will be able to use the elliptical every time I am at the gym. Sometimes as a beginning and ending and other times do all of my time at the gym on it.
I love the feeling of sweating (at the gym only).....I may look like crap since wet hair stuck to my head and a t-shirt that is stuck to me due to the sweat is not an attractive sight but for some reason the sweating makes me feel accomplished. Weird huh?
Each turn on the elliptical in my head I hear Cardio, Cardio, Cardio which to me equals calories, calories, calories......I have to believe this will make me more successful in my quest for good health......and that's what it's all about (no I am not doing the hokey pokey while typing those last few words)!!
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Yesterday Was Rough....
I cried more yesterday than I have in a long time....
I went to Weight Watchers and was up a pound. That equals 4 sticks of butter!!! I didn't stay for the meeting....I just couldn't. I cried all the way home. I cried for an hour when I got home (I was ironing while I cried....so the time wasn't a total waste). I was so upset and frustrated.
I worked out at the gym twice (thank you snowstorm for preventing me from getting to the gym ....that is sarcasm in case you can't read between my lines). I wrote down everything I ate.
I wanted to throw in the towel. OK so I will stay fat and die early.....what does it matter. No, I have not changed my mind about gastric bypass surgery!!! No, I am not willing to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser!!!! This is my private war and yesterday I lost a battle....
I spent so much of the day trying to regroup. I went for a pedicure. I went to Publix and bought a new variety of veggies for the steamer (asparagus, cabbage, onions, bean sprouts and water chestnuts). I also bought some grapes (at $2.49 a pound). I even splurged on a pound of shrimp to try in the steamer.
Even with all my best attempts to improve my mood and Jenn's encouragements....I still head a voice in the back of my head saying "You are a failure....you will always be fat." Very, very painful....
Did I blow the day by eating what I shouldn't? NO. Not that I didn't think about it.
This was one of the worst day I have had in a long, long time....
What I need is .....I am not sure.....but I do know I do not need more advice.....I am up to my eyeballs with advice. I guess I just am asking for encouragement. No, I am not asking anyone to join my pity party and say "Oh Donna, it's OK." I need "Donna, I know you can do it." or "Donna, hang in there you are doing OK" or "My Donna, your ear lobes are looking thinner."
I need my cheering section.....
This is my private war to get healthier but I decided to make it public by writing this blog. I think you will agree most times my entries are positive and upbeat. So please allow me this entry to be just a little down.
Today is a new day and I didn't screw up yesterday (eating wise). So here I go again into battle....chasing my demons away....
Take notice: THIS IS A WAR I FULLY INTEND TO WIN....one day at a time....
I went to Weight Watchers and was up a pound. That equals 4 sticks of butter!!! I didn't stay for the meeting....I just couldn't. I cried all the way home. I cried for an hour when I got home (I was ironing while I cried....so the time wasn't a total waste). I was so upset and frustrated.
I worked out at the gym twice (thank you snowstorm for preventing me from getting to the gym ....that is sarcasm in case you can't read between my lines). I wrote down everything I ate.
I wanted to throw in the towel. OK so I will stay fat and die early.....what does it matter. No, I have not changed my mind about gastric bypass surgery!!! No, I am not willing to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser!!!! This is my private war and yesterday I lost a battle....
I spent so much of the day trying to regroup. I went for a pedicure. I went to Publix and bought a new variety of veggies for the steamer (asparagus, cabbage, onions, bean sprouts and water chestnuts). I also bought some grapes (at $2.49 a pound). I even splurged on a pound of shrimp to try in the steamer.
Even with all my best attempts to improve my mood and Jenn's encouragements....I still head a voice in the back of my head saying "You are a failure....you will always be fat." Very, very painful....
Did I blow the day by eating what I shouldn't? NO. Not that I didn't think about it.
This was one of the worst day I have had in a long, long time....
What I need is .....I am not sure.....but I do know I do not need more advice.....I am up to my eyeballs with advice. I guess I just am asking for encouragement. No, I am not asking anyone to join my pity party and say "Oh Donna, it's OK." I need "Donna, I know you can do it." or "Donna, hang in there you are doing OK" or "My Donna, your ear lobes are looking thinner."
I need my cheering section.....
This is my private war to get healthier but I decided to make it public by writing this blog. I think you will agree most times my entries are positive and upbeat. So please allow me this entry to be just a little down.
Today is a new day and I didn't screw up yesterday (eating wise). So here I go again into battle....chasing my demons away....
Take notice: THIS IS A WAR I FULLY INTEND TO WIN....one day at a time....
Back to the Elliptical
I worked out with Carol Thursday and she gave me some good news....
I can get back on the elliptical.....WOO HOO !!!! I have missed it so much !!! Several months ago I hurt my hip and it made using that machine painful. Carol has made me stay away in order to give my hip time to heal. Now that the pain is gone next Thursday part of our workout will consist of the elliptical and me. Carol wants to make sure I am using it correctly.....not learning too much to one side or the other....core muscles lined up....not slouching over...etc.
She feels if I can get on the elliptical a couple of times a week it will help my weight loss. Cardio, cardio, cardio.....
I am very excited and looking forward to Thursday....let's see how I feel on Friday...
Carol said she was going to shake up my workouts this year.....getting back on the elliptical is one of those shake ups.....she said we need to change things up so my body doesn't get used to our workout routines....a year ago I never knew the title of this blog entry would make me so happy....
Wish me luck and say a prayer for no hip pain....I really want to be able to do this and burn more calories....
I can get back on the elliptical.....WOO HOO !!!! I have missed it so much !!! Several months ago I hurt my hip and it made using that machine painful. Carol has made me stay away in order to give my hip time to heal. Now that the pain is gone next Thursday part of our workout will consist of the elliptical and me. Carol wants to make sure I am using it correctly.....not learning too much to one side or the other....core muscles lined up....not slouching over...etc.
She feels if I can get on the elliptical a couple of times a week it will help my weight loss. Cardio, cardio, cardio.....
I am very excited and looking forward to Thursday....let's see how I feel on Friday...
Carol said she was going to shake up my workouts this year.....getting back on the elliptical is one of those shake ups.....she said we need to change things up so my body doesn't get used to our workout routines....a year ago I never knew the title of this blog entry would make me so happy....
Wish me luck and say a prayer for no hip pain....I really want to be able to do this and burn more calories....
Highlights vs. Coloring It All
As I have said in previous posting, I am not sure why I share so much info.....
Last week I went to get my hair cut. Wayne and I discussed whether or not I should get highlights. My concern was will highlights make my hair look thinner than it already is? Should I dye it all one color? Wayne pointed out that dying my hair all one color would accentuate my scalp and make my hair look thinner and my scalp would stand out more. With highlights, the mixture of colors would not draw as much attention to my thin hair and scalp. The highlights would also give my hair some extra body (something I do not need in other places).
So highlights it was !! A little of some kind of lotion to add some body/thickness and I loved my hair. Yes, it may be an illusion using mirrors and smoke but it made me feel better.
The next morning I actually put some of the lotion in my hair and used a curling iron. My hair looked better than it has in a long time. Not as good as when Wayne does it but I was pleased with what I was able to do. I didn't even burn myself with the curling iron and kept the temp on it low so as to not burn my hair either.
OK, so the top of my head is looking better....I will never have a nice full head of hair like so many of my friends (I do envy them) but that's alright.....at least I feel a little better about my hair.
I am sure some of you are thinking....how vain she is.....I know with all the things going wrong in the world.....unemployment, foreclosures, blizzards.....my hair doesn't even justify a posting.....but it does to me.....so sorry if you think I am being self-centered....at 55 I think I am entitled to....
I also got a pedicures so my toes look great....
OK so the top of my head looks better and the toes look good.....now I have to work on the parts in between.....
Last week I went to get my hair cut. Wayne and I discussed whether or not I should get highlights. My concern was will highlights make my hair look thinner than it already is? Should I dye it all one color? Wayne pointed out that dying my hair all one color would accentuate my scalp and make my hair look thinner and my scalp would stand out more. With highlights, the mixture of colors would not draw as much attention to my thin hair and scalp. The highlights would also give my hair some extra body (something I do not need in other places).
So highlights it was !! A little of some kind of lotion to add some body/thickness and I loved my hair. Yes, it may be an illusion using mirrors and smoke but it made me feel better.
The next morning I actually put some of the lotion in my hair and used a curling iron. My hair looked better than it has in a long time. Not as good as when Wayne does it but I was pleased with what I was able to do. I didn't even burn myself with the curling iron and kept the temp on it low so as to not burn my hair either.
OK, so the top of my head is looking better....I will never have a nice full head of hair like so many of my friends (I do envy them) but that's alright.....at least I feel a little better about my hair.
I am sure some of you are thinking....how vain she is.....I know with all the things going wrong in the world.....unemployment, foreclosures, blizzards.....my hair doesn't even justify a posting.....but it does to me.....so sorry if you think I am being self-centered....at 55 I think I am entitled to....
I also got a pedicures so my toes look great....
OK so the top of my head looks better and the toes look good.....now I have to work on the parts in between.....
Monday, January 10, 2011
Friends on the Book Tour
I have more friends who want to come on my book tour. In an entry last week, I mentioned that Jenn and Gigi would be joining me. I had other friends who said what about me??
Diana has offered to be my dresser. She has promised to find me black dresses (my dream dress) and great accessories. Diana you're in !!!!
Mary and Deanna can be my front people. Getting there ahead of time to make sure everything is ready for me. It will also help to know where I have to be and when. They will be like Gayle King is to Oprah.....part of my adventures, there to keep me balanced and rope me in when I need it.
Teresa will also be coming along. She will deal with anyone who is too pushy or gives me a hard time. She has the skills to defuse any tough situations.
Carol would have to come to make sure I am getting my workouts in....
So far that's the list....
If you want to join the entourage just let me know.....I want fun people to join me on this trip.
Any time now you can shake me and say "Donna, you need to be realistic." You know what....I know it sounds like a far fetched dream but that OK....nothing happens unless there is a dream.....someone famous said that but for the life of me I can't think of who it is.....
See.... I need someone who knows that kind of info.....who ever gets the answer Correct can come on the book tour.....
Kathy, Debbie, Debra....name your job....I want you all there too!!!!
It's my dream.....I am allowed to dream big.....it's what keeps me going....dreams of finally getting to goal weight at weight watchers....dreams of climbing stairs without hesitation.....dreams of buying that cute black dress right off the rack.....without dreams what would be the point???
Diana has offered to be my dresser. She has promised to find me black dresses (my dream dress) and great accessories. Diana you're in !!!!
Mary and Deanna can be my front people. Getting there ahead of time to make sure everything is ready for me. It will also help to know where I have to be and when. They will be like Gayle King is to Oprah.....part of my adventures, there to keep me balanced and rope me in when I need it.
Teresa will also be coming along. She will deal with anyone who is too pushy or gives me a hard time. She has the skills to defuse any tough situations.
Carol would have to come to make sure I am getting my workouts in....
So far that's the list....
If you want to join the entourage just let me know.....I want fun people to join me on this trip.
Any time now you can shake me and say "Donna, you need to be realistic." You know what....I know it sounds like a far fetched dream but that OK....nothing happens unless there is a dream.....someone famous said that but for the life of me I can't think of who it is.....
See.... I need someone who knows that kind of info.....who ever gets the answer Correct can come on the book tour.....
Kathy, Debbie, Debra....name your job....I want you all there too!!!!
It's my dream.....I am allowed to dream big.....it's what keeps me going....dreams of finally getting to goal weight at weight watchers....dreams of climbing stairs without hesitation.....dreams of buying that cute black dress right off the rack.....without dreams what would be the point???
Cooking Up A Storm on a SNOW DAY !!!
Today was one of those rare snow days. Work was closed. I had gotten all of my chores done over the week-end so I could do what I wanted today.
What did I decide to do?? Cook.
I made a pot of sauce. Nothing like the homemade kind....yum !!!
I made Weight Watchers Pumpkin Muffins....so easy but so good !!!
I made some Weight Watchers Pasta Salad....this will be great with my lunches for the rest of the week....just add some tuna, chicken or lean ham.
Then drum roll please......
I decided to see how my rice and veggie steamer works. Over the week-end I bought mushrooms, celery, snow peas, broccoli and squash (both yellow and green). I decided to try just the veggie steamer part and not do the rice. I read the instruction manual (those of you who know me well know this is a step I usually skip....LOL). Well, to tell you the truth it was so darn easy. the hardest part was cutting up the veggies. OK I did go a little over board and had to do the veggies in three batches but still it was so cool. I bought some low sodium teriyaki to put on the veggies to add a little something extra.
I am very excited....this was one of my New Years resolutions to try something new with food. So one resolution already checked off. I will continue to use the steamer and see what else I can create. I bought brown rice and maybe just maybe will buy some shrimp or a piece of fish I can steam....oh the possibilities are endless.
Things like trying out the veggie steamer are important because it gives me a jump start....something new to try....it prevents me from getting bored. I am trying to keep up my interest.....boredom can be a death sentence to all my efforts.
So if a veggie steamer is what it takes to keep me pumped and on track....so be it....I will continue to search for new and exciting items, foods or recipes....I need the motivation....
What did I decide to do?? Cook.
I made a pot of sauce. Nothing like the homemade kind....yum !!!
I made Weight Watchers Pumpkin Muffins....so easy but so good !!!
I made some Weight Watchers Pasta Salad....this will be great with my lunches for the rest of the week....just add some tuna, chicken or lean ham.
Then drum roll please......
I decided to see how my rice and veggie steamer works. Over the week-end I bought mushrooms, celery, snow peas, broccoli and squash (both yellow and green). I decided to try just the veggie steamer part and not do the rice. I read the instruction manual (those of you who know me well know this is a step I usually skip....LOL). Well, to tell you the truth it was so darn easy. the hardest part was cutting up the veggies. OK I did go a little over board and had to do the veggies in three batches but still it was so cool. I bought some low sodium teriyaki to put on the veggies to add a little something extra.
I am very excited....this was one of my New Years resolutions to try something new with food. So one resolution already checked off. I will continue to use the steamer and see what else I can create. I bought brown rice and maybe just maybe will buy some shrimp or a piece of fish I can steam....oh the possibilities are endless.
Things like trying out the veggie steamer are important because it gives me a jump start....something new to try....it prevents me from getting bored. I am trying to keep up my interest.....boredom can be a death sentence to all my efforts.
So if a veggie steamer is what it takes to keep me pumped and on track....so be it....I will continue to search for new and exciting items, foods or recipes....I need the motivation....
A Sunday Workout
I wanted to start the week with a workout...so Jenn and I headed to the gym Sunday morning. It wasn't as crowded as it was earlier in the week. You know....with all those people who have made a New Years resolution to work out more often. Last year, that was me.....I am very proud that I stuck with it!!
I decided to do my FAVORITE activity......the stairs. I did them for 30 minutes and worked up a good sweat. I threw in some machines and headed home.
Most days, I no longer feel like I don't belong at the gym. Once in a while I get uncomfortable being there but that is usually when I see people doing things I have yet to accomplish. Then I have to remind myself how much I HAVE accomplished in the past year.
The workout was a good way to start the week....I always feel better when I leave the gym....it must be those....endorphins....I am told they make you happy....and I am happy after a workout not just because it is time to go home but because I have followed up in my commitment to a healthier lifestyle....
Come on endorphins....hang with me....in need you....
I decided to do my FAVORITE activity......the stairs. I did them for 30 minutes and worked up a good sweat. I threw in some machines and headed home.
Most days, I no longer feel like I don't belong at the gym. Once in a while I get uncomfortable being there but that is usually when I see people doing things I have yet to accomplish. Then I have to remind myself how much I HAVE accomplished in the past year.
The workout was a good way to start the week....I always feel better when I leave the gym....it must be those....endorphins....I am told they make you happy....and I am happy after a workout not just because it is time to go home but because I have followed up in my commitment to a healthier lifestyle....
Come on endorphins....hang with me....in need you....
How hard should it be to buy a scale
I decided that since I had a bad weigh-in (not that I am fixated on this....LOL), I needed to buy a scale. I like getting on the scale just once a week but after Saturday's disaster (OK I do need to get over it....not like I haven't had a bad week before.....LOL)I thought it might not hurt to have a scale in the house. Jenn and I went scale shopping.....
What the hell happened to the scales that we used to have .....you know the kind.....they told you your weight.....
Now, the scales tell you you BMI, save your weight, tell you how many points you can eat, will prepare your tax returns and schedule your car for an oil change.....
When did it become so hard to find a damn scale that just told you what you weighed....not one that calls you fatso or announces your weight to the world or saves your weight for all to see into the next century.....
Finally, I found what I wanted....a plain old scale.....white with numbers....simple...
Now I need to compare the scale at Weight Watchers to the one at home too see if they match up. I promised myself not to become obsessive about weighing myself daily or hourly. I will not lug the scale around the house to see where I weigh the least. I will not blame the floor I use it on, the slant of the foundation of my house or the fact that I am not in my usual weigh-in clothes.
This afternoon I got on the scale....the result ....up 1 pound.....ggggrrrrr...maybe it was because I usually weigh-in first thing in the morning.....maybe it was because I had already eaten......don't we usually weigh more as the day goes on??
See here I go....making myself crazy.....all because of that little square piece of metal with numbers on it.....Donna get over it!!! That little square does not reflect who you are....it doesn't measure effort or desire or all the things you have passed up....
It is simply a tool used to measure one form of progress....it is not the be all and end all.....well maybe for me it is.....
What the hell happened to the scales that we used to have .....you know the kind.....they told you your weight.....
Now, the scales tell you you BMI, save your weight, tell you how many points you can eat, will prepare your tax returns and schedule your car for an oil change.....
When did it become so hard to find a damn scale that just told you what you weighed....not one that calls you fatso or announces your weight to the world or saves your weight for all to see into the next century.....
Finally, I found what I wanted....a plain old scale.....white with numbers....simple...
Now I need to compare the scale at Weight Watchers to the one at home too see if they match up. I promised myself not to become obsessive about weighing myself daily or hourly. I will not lug the scale around the house to see where I weigh the least. I will not blame the floor I use it on, the slant of the foundation of my house or the fact that I am not in my usual weigh-in clothes.
This afternoon I got on the scale....the result ....up 1 pound.....ggggrrrrr...maybe it was because I usually weigh-in first thing in the morning.....maybe it was because I had already eaten......don't we usually weigh more as the day goes on??
See here I go....making myself crazy.....all because of that little square piece of metal with numbers on it.....Donna get over it!!! That little square does not reflect who you are....it doesn't measure effort or desire or all the things you have passed up....
It is simply a tool used to measure one form of progress....it is not the be all and end all.....well maybe for me it is.....
So I Thought I Did Well Over The Holidays.....
I really thought I had done well over the holidays!!!! I wrote down what I ate almost everyday. I may have missed a day or two or three but did make a concerted effort to journal my food.....
OK so my weigh-in was a disaster. Maybe I am being just a little dramatic but I was not pleased with what I saw on the scale.
Here is how I know I am changing....
the old Donna would have cried and left Weight Watchers not staying for the meeting. That was the way I used to handle a bad week. But I decided to suck it up and stay for the meeting. Maybe I would hear something new or reinforce something I had heard before. A girl was there (much younger than me)....she has lost 100 pounds in the last year.....why can't that be me.....it's not like I am not trying !!!! She was upset she was up at the scales too. I talked to another lady who has lost 80 pounds and she was up too. Not that it really has anything to do with my lousy weigh-in. I also hadn't gotten on a scale in 3 weeks due to the holidays.I called Jenn told her what had happened. Then I decided..... OK enough of the pity party. Pick myself up and move along.
Some days I am so ready to throw in the towel.....
That is the way I felt Saturday.....
But now it's Monday....
And I am ready to recommit and refocus....
That is what my head is saying....but my heart needs a little time to follow....
OK so my weigh-in was a disaster. Maybe I am being just a little dramatic but I was not pleased with what I saw on the scale.
Here is how I know I am changing....
the old Donna would have cried and left Weight Watchers not staying for the meeting. That was the way I used to handle a bad week. But I decided to suck it up and stay for the meeting. Maybe I would hear something new or reinforce something I had heard before. A girl was there (much younger than me)....she has lost 100 pounds in the last year.....why can't that be me.....it's not like I am not trying !!!! She was upset she was up at the scales too. I talked to another lady who has lost 80 pounds and she was up too. Not that it really has anything to do with my lousy weigh-in. I also hadn't gotten on a scale in 3 weeks due to the holidays.I called Jenn told her what had happened. Then I decided..... OK enough of the pity party. Pick myself up and move along.
Some days I am so ready to throw in the towel.....
That is the way I felt Saturday.....
But now it's Monday....
And I am ready to recommit and refocus....
That is what my head is saying....but my heart needs a little time to follow....
Sunday, January 2, 2011
My 100th Post !!!!!
It is hard to believe but I have posted 100 times to this blog.....
I am so proud of myself for sticking with it.
I have a habit of starting something full force and then fade out. To confirm this just look at all my half done craft projects, the recipes I cut out but never made and the times in years past where my New Year's resolutions were forgotten before the last version of Auld Lang Syne had been sung.
As I have shared with you....last year was different. Like the Chinese New Year has the year of the horse or bird or tiger. 2010 was the year of me !!!! Well, unlike the Chinese....I am making 2011 the same name as last year.....call it All About Me, the sequel !!
Look forward to posts about new recipes tried, stretching what I can do at the gym (I am sure Carol will see to that!!!) and continued success at the scale !!!
Carol's suggestion that I start a blog was a stroke of genius. I have always loved writing and this blog has given me the outlet to write on a regular basis. I have found it very therapeutic and sharing my feelings, adventures, successes and failures with all of you has been:
1. scary
2. terrifying
3. freeing
4. emotional
5. sad
6. funny
7. positive
8. a stretch
9. rewarding
10. A BLAST
I am excited to continue this blog and look forward to the next 100 or 200 entries. I dream that someday maybe just maybe it can be turned into a book. Think how much fun a book tour would be????
I do not think my experiences in the last year were unusual but I think the sharing it is what may makes my journey unique. If one person see this blog as interesting reading or a positive experience I will feel the time at my computer each week will have been worth it.
My friend Gigi and I have joked about a book tour....Gigi on one side of me and Jenn on the other while I autograph books. Jenn keeping the line moving and Gigi tapping me on the shoulder say "Donna, we only have a few more minutes and then we have to wrap it up." Talking about my book on Ellen or Oprah (I guess on her new network)...
The way I have dreamed of going to Italy....of wearing a basic black dress I just bought off the rack......I dream about being published.
Maybe this is the time my dreams start to come true.......
I am so proud of myself for sticking with it.
I have a habit of starting something full force and then fade out. To confirm this just look at all my half done craft projects, the recipes I cut out but never made and the times in years past where my New Year's resolutions were forgotten before the last version of Auld Lang Syne had been sung.
As I have shared with you....last year was different. Like the Chinese New Year has the year of the horse or bird or tiger. 2010 was the year of me !!!! Well, unlike the Chinese....I am making 2011 the same name as last year.....call it All About Me, the sequel !!
Look forward to posts about new recipes tried, stretching what I can do at the gym (I am sure Carol will see to that!!!) and continued success at the scale !!!
Carol's suggestion that I start a blog was a stroke of genius. I have always loved writing and this blog has given me the outlet to write on a regular basis. I have found it very therapeutic and sharing my feelings, adventures, successes and failures with all of you has been:
1. scary
2. terrifying
3. freeing
4. emotional
5. sad
6. funny
7. positive
8. a stretch
9. rewarding
10. A BLAST
I am excited to continue this blog and look forward to the next 100 or 200 entries. I dream that someday maybe just maybe it can be turned into a book. Think how much fun a book tour would be????
I do not think my experiences in the last year were unusual but I think the sharing it is what may makes my journey unique. If one person see this blog as interesting reading or a positive experience I will feel the time at my computer each week will have been worth it.
My friend Gigi and I have joked about a book tour....Gigi on one side of me and Jenn on the other while I autograph books. Jenn keeping the line moving and Gigi tapping me on the shoulder say "Donna, we only have a few more minutes and then we have to wrap it up." Talking about my book on Ellen or Oprah (I guess on her new network)...
The way I have dreamed of going to Italy....of wearing a basic black dress I just bought off the rack......I dream about being published.
Maybe this is the time my dreams start to come true.......
Hoppin' Johns and Time to Start the New Year....
Yesterday, I made my 1st attempt at the traditional southern New Year's meal. I made corn bread, collards, hoppin' johns and ham (in lieu of pork....hey it all comes from the same animal!!!). I was so pleased with the way it turned out....the corn bread was so easy....thank you Jiffy box mix. The collards were canned (ok I made it easy for me). The hoppin' johns was from a recipe I found in a magazine last week. It tasted great!!!!
Today, I pitched out the Christmas cookies still in the house (yes, they were still calling my name!!!!). I might go to Earth Fare and get some Buffalo jerky...yum...high in protein low in fat and carb's. Also heading to Publix for some veggies (for the steamer) and fruit.
I know people get all excited about the New Year.....resolving to exercise more (or a weight watchers calls it....more activity) and eat healthier. The problem is they don't stick to it. Last year, I was able to stick to my goals. This year I feel even stronger about the challenge I have ahead.
I even decided to label the foods I usually have in the house with the number of points they equal on the WW points plus program. If you decide to peek in my pantry don't laugh at the boxes and packages with numbers written on them with a sharpie....it will make my life easier and I won't have to look up the foods I eat the most often.
I have never been this excited at the start of a New Year.....throw some confetti, shoot off some fireworks, blow a horn.....the New Year has arrived and so have I !!!!!! LOL.....
Today, I pitched out the Christmas cookies still in the house (yes, they were still calling my name!!!!). I might go to Earth Fare and get some Buffalo jerky...yum...high in protein low in fat and carb's. Also heading to Publix for some veggies (for the steamer) and fruit.
I know people get all excited about the New Year.....resolving to exercise more (or a weight watchers calls it....more activity) and eat healthier. The problem is they don't stick to it. Last year, I was able to stick to my goals. This year I feel even stronger about the challenge I have ahead.
I even decided to label the foods I usually have in the house with the number of points they equal on the WW points plus program. If you decide to peek in my pantry don't laugh at the boxes and packages with numbers written on them with a sharpie....it will make my life easier and I won't have to look up the foods I eat the most often.
I have never been this excited at the start of a New Year.....throw some confetti, shoot off some fireworks, blow a horn.....the New Year has arrived and so have I !!!!!! LOL.....
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Last Workout For 2010....
This entry will be a little out of order....sorry....when I get an entry idea for a blog I do not always think of the order in which I should go.....
Last Thursday, 12/30/10, last workout of the year. I climbed, bent, stretched, lifted and squatted. I was doing pretty well especially since I finally found a pair of comfortable sneakers at home. That means I will be buying a new pair of Easy Spirits since they didn't make my feel feel cramped or ache.
Anyway, back to the work out......we were doing pretty well and then Carol told me to hold a 6 pound ball between my hands with my arms stretched out in front of me and climb up and down on the stepper. I looked at her with those deer in the headlights eyes. She said "go ahead". I thought to myself, I can't do this.....my arms hurt, my legs are tired and I don't think I can hold my arms out straight and climb.....oh and I forgot I also have to breathe.....give me a break !!! Well, I did as I was told. By the time we had done all the rep's my arms felt like jelly, they were shaking and I felt like I had used every ounce of strength I had just to finish. At first I felt bad that a simple routine like that would be such a struggle but then I thought.....I DID IT !!!
My year of workouts ended on a positive note....I have learned that I don't need to compete with any one else.....all that matters is that I am making strides and I am improving from where I started.....to all that I can say yes.... I am making strides, yes.... I have improved a lot from where I started and yes.... I can truly say I am looking forward to the new challenges at the gym during 2011....I hope Carol, my trainer didn't read this.....LOL......OK Carol... bring it on !!!!
Last Thursday, 12/30/10, last workout of the year. I climbed, bent, stretched, lifted and squatted. I was doing pretty well especially since I finally found a pair of comfortable sneakers at home. That means I will be buying a new pair of Easy Spirits since they didn't make my feel feel cramped or ache.
Anyway, back to the work out......we were doing pretty well and then Carol told me to hold a 6 pound ball between my hands with my arms stretched out in front of me and climb up and down on the stepper. I looked at her with those deer in the headlights eyes. She said "go ahead". I thought to myself, I can't do this.....my arms hurt, my legs are tired and I don't think I can hold my arms out straight and climb.....oh and I forgot I also have to breathe.....give me a break !!! Well, I did as I was told. By the time we had done all the rep's my arms felt like jelly, they were shaking and I felt like I had used every ounce of strength I had just to finish. At first I felt bad that a simple routine like that would be such a struggle but then I thought.....I DID IT !!!
My year of workouts ended on a positive note....I have learned that I don't need to compete with any one else.....all that matters is that I am making strides and I am improving from where I started.....to all that I can say yes.... I am making strides, yes.... I have improved a lot from where I started and yes.... I can truly say I am looking forward to the new challenges at the gym during 2011....I hope Carol, my trainer didn't read this.....LOL......OK Carol... bring it on !!!!
Everyone Deserves A Chance To Fly....
My favorite musical is Wicked. It is the story of the Wicked Witch of the West before she became mean. There are those of you who might think I would be perfect for the part....
Anyway, in the play the Wizard of Oz tells Elphaba (the name of the Wicked Witch of the West) that "Everyone deserves a chance to fly."
I love that line....kind of reminds me of what I am trying to accomplish when I work out or as I follow the Weight Watchers program. I have been held down so long by me.....now it is my time to try and fly.
I have been weighted down by others words, looks, opinions and yes, when you hear the negatives long enough you start to believe what you hear. When you hear the whispers or laughter and know it is directed at you....it can be devastating. You hurt in a way you didn't think was possible.
The words and cruel remarks don't hurt quite as much as the used to because now I am starting to feel good about me. I still feel the stares and hear the giggles as I walk by but I have to believe that if any of those people could walk in my shoes for just one day they would feel or react differently,
Each step I climb at the gym, each treat I pass up, each ounce I lose brings me closer to the person I know I can be.....this is not a vanity trip ....although it would be nice to shop off the rack of any store.... it is more about good health and a long life.
When I leave the gym or Weight Watchers meeting and have been successful, my step is just a little lighter....if I have a rough week at the scales I do not let it weigh me down (no pun intended)....I now think....I will do better next week....
I am no longer Jacob Marley who carried the chains that he forged in life.....I am more life Elphaba....misunderstood, tried to do good, but things didn't always turn out right....
I deserve a chance to fly and defy gravity.....that is what I am working on this year.....get ready and watch me soar...
Anyway, in the play the Wizard of Oz tells Elphaba (the name of the Wicked Witch of the West) that "Everyone deserves a chance to fly."
I love that line....kind of reminds me of what I am trying to accomplish when I work out or as I follow the Weight Watchers program. I have been held down so long by me.....now it is my time to try and fly.
I have been weighted down by others words, looks, opinions and yes, when you hear the negatives long enough you start to believe what you hear. When you hear the whispers or laughter and know it is directed at you....it can be devastating. You hurt in a way you didn't think was possible.
The words and cruel remarks don't hurt quite as much as the used to because now I am starting to feel good about me. I still feel the stares and hear the giggles as I walk by but I have to believe that if any of those people could walk in my shoes for just one day they would feel or react differently,
Each step I climb at the gym, each treat I pass up, each ounce I lose brings me closer to the person I know I can be.....this is not a vanity trip ....although it would be nice to shop off the rack of any store.... it is more about good health and a long life.
When I leave the gym or Weight Watchers meeting and have been successful, my step is just a little lighter....if I have a rough week at the scales I do not let it weigh me down (no pun intended)....I now think....I will do better next week....
I am no longer Jacob Marley who carried the chains that he forged in life.....I am more life Elphaba....misunderstood, tried to do good, but things didn't always turn out right....
I deserve a chance to fly and defy gravity.....that is what I am working on this year.....get ready and watch me soar...
Put the oxygen mask on yourself then the kids
I heard someone say on TV today that the advice given on an airplane is that if the oxygen masks fall put yours on first then help your children put on theirs. Human nature is to take care of the children first and then ourselves. We get so conditioned to putting ourselves last that even when are children are grown we forget to put ourselves first.
I really have had to focus on me. I have even had people criticize me for trying to put myself at the head of the line. When people are used to hearing you say "Oh I don't mind waiting" or " "Go ahead of me" or "I don't want it you can have it" or "You take it I don't mind", they have a heard time hearing you say, "I am focusing on me" or "Yes, it is all about me" or "I want to do this for me".
I spent last year trying to feel comfortable standing at the front of the line. I feel I have earned the right to focus on myself. Sounds confident... right? Then why the hell do I feel so guilty????
It's not like I have a young child at home. I have a very self-sufficient grown daughter. My husband is used to being catered to but you know what?? That needs to change. I cannot fully focus on me if he feels the focus should be on him. For a change, I need to be the center of my own universe. How selfish that sounds....but if I don't do it now.... then when??? It's not like I am hiding money, or doing extravagent things for me and no one else. Unless you consider the gym and Weight Watchers big extravagances.....I call then necessities. They are necessary for me to become the person I should have or could have been if I hadn't gotten lost in the shuffle.
OK ....it is time for me to put on my oxygen mask and take a deep breath...ready, set, go...
I really have had to focus on me. I have even had people criticize me for trying to put myself at the head of the line. When people are used to hearing you say "Oh I don't mind waiting" or " "Go ahead of me" or "I don't want it you can have it" or "You take it I don't mind", they have a heard time hearing you say, "I am focusing on me" or "Yes, it is all about me" or "I want to do this for me".
I spent last year trying to feel comfortable standing at the front of the line. I feel I have earned the right to focus on myself. Sounds confident... right? Then why the hell do I feel so guilty????
It's not like I have a young child at home. I have a very self-sufficient grown daughter. My husband is used to being catered to but you know what?? That needs to change. I cannot fully focus on me if he feels the focus should be on him. For a change, I need to be the center of my own universe. How selfish that sounds....but if I don't do it now.... then when??? It's not like I am hiding money, or doing extravagent things for me and no one else. Unless you consider the gym and Weight Watchers big extravagances.....I call then necessities. They are necessary for me to become the person I should have or could have been if I hadn't gotten lost in the shuffle.
OK ....it is time for me to put on my oxygen mask and take a deep breath...ready, set, go...
2011 Resolutions
I have made a list of resolutions for the coming year. Last year, I did pretty well sticking to them.....going to the gym on a regular basis, eating healthier, working at my weight, reading more, more focus on me.
Here is the list for 2011:
1. Continue to explore healthier food options- more trying new foods at Earth Fare, using my new rice and veggie steamer, picking foods higher in fiber and lower in sugar and carbs
2. Kick it up a notch at the gym - ok this one is scary if Carol, my trainer, reads this...LOL
3. Get something I write published
4. Continue blog- I have almost 100 posts now
5. Weigh less at the end of the year than the beginning
6. Go on a fun trip
7. Read more- easy with a Kindle
8. More time with friends and family- pure fun
9. Laugh more-especially at work (this could take up my whole resolution list)
10.Keep putting me at the top of the list- continue to make me a priority
11.Keep at least 5 of the resolutions
Hey it's Jan 1st and I have already done #1, 4 7, 8 and 11.....only 364 days to go!!!
Here is the list for 2011:
1. Continue to explore healthier food options- more trying new foods at Earth Fare, using my new rice and veggie steamer, picking foods higher in fiber and lower in sugar and carbs
2. Kick it up a notch at the gym - ok this one is scary if Carol, my trainer, reads this...LOL
3. Get something I write published
4. Continue blog- I have almost 100 posts now
5. Weigh less at the end of the year than the beginning
6. Go on a fun trip
7. Read more- easy with a Kindle
8. More time with friends and family- pure fun
9. Laugh more-especially at work (this could take up my whole resolution list)
10.Keep putting me at the top of the list- continue to make me a priority
11.Keep at least 5 of the resolutions
Hey it's Jan 1st and I have already done #1, 4 7, 8 and 11.....only 364 days to go!!!
Best of 2010
As I start my new journal for 2011, I felt the need to list what I thought were some (not all of the best)of the best things about 2010.
Here is the list:
1. Road trip to NY with Jenn in July
2. Saw Wicked again in June
3. Went to gym on a regular basis- all year
4. Weighed a lot less at the end of the year than the beginning
5. Mom was well enough of visit SC- December
6. Started to explore healthier eating option- Earth Fare, quinoa, less soda
7. Love Weight Watchers new Points Plus program
8. Kept up with blog since I started it in March
9. Jenn a huge help during the year especially during our recent floods in the house
10. Incentives never hurt.
A nice list. I had no idea at the start of 2010 where the year would go but now in review it was a blast !!!
Here is the list:
1. Road trip to NY with Jenn in July
2. Saw Wicked again in June
3. Went to gym on a regular basis- all year
4. Weighed a lot less at the end of the year than the beginning
5. Mom was well enough of visit SC- December
6. Started to explore healthier eating option- Earth Fare, quinoa, less soda
7. Love Weight Watchers new Points Plus program
8. Kept up with blog since I started it in March
9. Jenn a huge help during the year especially during our recent floods in the house
10. Incentives never hurt.
A nice list. I had no idea at the start of 2010 where the year would go but now in review it was a blast !!!
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