Up off the floor....

Thursday at the gym was ....oh what would I call it......difficult......challenging.....scary......

Carol started our work out with the usual dead lifts, weights and stretches. Then she says " Don't think I am crazy but I want you to do this" next thing I know she is sitting on the floor and lifting herself up. I look at her and start to cry. In my head I am thinking " I can't do this!!!!" I don't say the words out loud but Carol can tell by the look on my face what I am thinking. She says, "I have never asked you to do something you couldn't do" which is true. First, she wants me on the Pilate's ball and to get up and down. I like to sit on a firm surface instead. So I go from the weight bench to the floor. Now the struggle begins.....due a previous injury I can barely lean on my right knee. I really need a pillow or something to lean it on. So instead I don't bend the right knee at all or almost at all and struggle to get off the floor pushing my arms against the bench and pushing on my leg.......finally I am standing up.....I am sweating and crying......crying from embarrassment that it took some much effort for me to do something so basic and simple......also concerned at how I looked to the others in the ladies gym with me....Carol says we will be doing this again and again in the next few weeks until I can do it with more ease.....

Friday.....my knee and hip are a little sore.....my shoulders ache from trying to lift myself off the floor.....but I did feel good mentally that I had accomplished what is a huge feat for me.....hope fully it will get better with time....just another hill to climb......lead on Carol....I am right behind you.....